Fucking pet dog owners
"Hey so I have this totally specific problem but like I can’t fix it because I don’t want to be self aware and realize I’m the jackass that is causing my dog to fail in whatever way so um can you like fix it? I’ll pay you. And then when it doesn’t work because really it’s all my fault, I’m going to call your boss and bitch about it. Because it’s always your fault."
Hey so um, fuck off.
Your dog snaps at you? Oh, she only snaps at you when you startle her? Maybe you shouldn’t startle her. Your dog “eats” the den? Oh, he’s allowed to roam the house when you’re going? Maybe you should crate him. Your dog eats out of the trash then gets sick and throws up on your carpet? Oh, he’s allowed in the kitchen where theres an open “welcome here” trash can? Maybe you should buy a new trash can with a lid, but it in the pantry or or crate the dog.
BOOM. Fucking genius. BOOM
That’ll be $500 please. And I love love love when I consistently request an owner to go directly to me for updates or problems or whatever but no matter how many times I tell them I’m the one to deal with, they call/email my boss. No. Stop it. My boss doesn’t care about your dog. I don’t even know if I care about your dog, but I’m getting paid to, so at least I’ll pretend. Help me help you.
Considering taking basic/intro vet/animal science/behavior classes at a local college. Because, why not? I can’t imagine having a basic concept of animal health would hurt me in anyway. In fact maybe if I had it, he’d fire that bitch who claims to have it. Even though she failed her classes. Whatever. They would have to be night or online classes though which is kind of a problem considering every surrounding area of where I live is sketchy as fuck after dark.